Teenage Behavior
Modification
Certainly, one of
the baffling mysteries of parental life!
If you've got a teenager in your household, I know I
won't have any trouble convincing you that teenage behavior can
be baffling, irrational and enough to drive you crazy, at
times. You love your child to pieces, would do anything for
them and spend sleepless nights trying to figure out how you
might improve communications.
The love between you is unconditional, yet there are those
incidents which leave you at an absolute loss for words! For
example, you wander into the kitchen, where your teen is
preparing a snack. You just happen to be
there for a
glass of water. You're sideswiped with an undeserved
remark. “Oh, I just hate it when you come snooping on me!”
Whoa. You do a mental regroup. “Hey, sweetie, I just came
for a glass of water. I didn't even know you were out in
the kitchen!” The response? “Can I just fix my food,
puhleeze?” Well, OK, you can do that. Your feelings are
hurt. You really didn't mean to be spying, for crying out
loud! “I love you!”, you say, in all sincerity, before
making your exit, water glass in hand. This is teenage
behavior. There's no other way to explain it.
You may well wonder why teenage behavior is outside the norm
of regular parent to kid communication. What you need to
understand is that there's no explaining it. Be assured that
your child loves you with all their heart, but once that child
becomes a teenager, all of the normal stops are pulled. Teenage
behavior is characterized by inexplicable conversation,
accusations and a general lack of civility. You just need to
acclimate your emotions to this difficult period of your
child's life. Yes, they'll come around – eventually.
In the meantime, which, incidentally, can be a considerable
stretch of time, you can read parenting advice, talk to your
friend who also has a teenager in the household and learn how
to mellow out on a moment's notice. If you don't vent a little
and take this teenage behavior with a grain of salt, there's
trouble ahead. Be assured that your newly precocious child, who
evidently knows everything there is to know, without your sage
input, will inevitably discover that this is not the case. Be
patient. Teenage behavior is driven largely by hormones and
friends.
Key to understanding your teenager's behavior is the
realization that everything you've tried to teach them is now
sinking in to their consciousness. They just refuse to give you
credit for knowing anything. Your teenager now feels that
they're ready to exercise all you've bestowed as wisdom and
re-make their own interpretation of same into their
reality.
What it amounts to, is that your child is now putting into
practice their version of ownership of their world. Really,
they feel that they are prepared for adult life. Teenage
behavior is characterized by control. Before the onset of
teenager-ism, you controlled what was acceptable and
unacceptable behavior. Your teen is no different,
developmentally, than any other teen. Teenage behavior, with
all of its puzzling characteristics, is simply a playing out of
roles.
Bide your time, vent with your sister and exchange stories.
You'll feel better. Your beloved child will outgrow this
notorious teenage behavior.
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